Wednesday, February 12, 2014

You know you're a CFer when...

I haven't seen this done very much so I thought I'd give it a go.

You know you're a CFer when:

  • Your gas can clear a room...or house...or town
  • You groan when you see one line to list your medication
  • You start carrying a medication list with you to avoid said groan. 
  • You groan extra loud (internally of course) when a nurse asks what medicines you are on after you just wrote them all down.
  • You're in the hospital so much that you know almost every nurse and respiratory therapist that comes into your hospital room
  • Even though you're older than 18, everyone assumes you are still a teenager (I constantly get told I look 15)
  • Your stomach bloats out so much that people give you stank looks because they think you're a pregnant teen. (I'm 20 and I'm not pregnant so you can stop staring now thanks) 
  • You can't help but get a little irritated when healthy people act like they are dying when they get a little cold. (don't blame them, they aren't used to not being able to breathe)
  • People give you stank looks for coughing too much in public
  • People ask if you're contagious
  • That first cough when you first wake up sets the tone for how the day will go
  • You make weird obnoxious noises or sing when you wear your vest (oh wait please tell me that someone else does that and I'm not just weird)
  • People always comment on how big some of your pills are and wonder how you manage to swallow them
  • You know when it's time to go into the hospital and even take a packed bag with you when you go to see the doctor
  • You know more about drugs/what they do/ and side effects than most nurses
  • You can ride an IV pole around like no one's business
  • You carry something to do into the bathroom because you'll be there awhile 
  • You stock up on air fresheners for the bathroom but let's be honest...there's no helping that
  • You have a love/hate relationship with your treatments. You hate to do them but if you didn't, you'd feel downright awful
  • You can do a nurse's job without a degree (maybe better than some nurses)
  • You work like dog to gain weight while everyone else works to lose
  • Every one thinks you're so lucky to be able to eat what you want and stay skinny
  • You have a third nipple aka a port (does not to apply to all)
  • You've had so many PICC lines that your upper arms are covered in little dot scars 
  • One of the most annoying sounds is beeping IV machines in the hospital
  • Laughing leads to a massive cough attacks
  • You have had a violent cough attack that your face turns red and makes your eyes watery
  • You've had a cough attack and mucus flew out....and you never found where it went. ( don't lie, it happens)
  • You've had so many X-rays that you'd probably glow in the dark
  • You've tried to trap and blow "smoke" out of your mouth while doing treatments 
  • Those pill organizers just aren't big enough for the job
  • You become a salt shaker when you sweat 
  • You cough up blood around someone and they completely freak out and want to call 911
  • Your fingers look just like ET's
  • You make it up a flight of stairs exhausted and panting...only to realize you have another 2 flights to go
  • Doing treatments involves everything and everyone in a 3 feet radius getting sprayed by medicine particles when you exhale
  • You've used empty saline syringes as water guns
  • You've tried that breathing through a straw because you saw that post about how breathing through a straw is like having CF (then you realize where your thinking went wrong with that idea as you gasp for air)
  • You can be sick, wearing oxygen, on the transplant, and still manage to keep a positive attitude and a smile like I see so many of my wonderful Cysters and Fibros doing. Bless their hearts.
Gosh I might need to do more parts to this list as I'm sure I'll think of more. Make this a list longer and funnier. I'd love to get some input from y'all! Feel free to comment with your "You know you're a CFer when" ideas!

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