Monday, October 15, 2012

Decisions, Decisions

My internal debate about my future career is raging once again. By the end of my spring semester I have to officially declare my major and start in on those career specific classes. When I went into college I knew exactly what I wanted to be: a kindergarten teacher. After a horrible education related class I had my doubts. So after that so many options bounced around in my mind. I'm currently majoring in nursing, but I transferred and lost a lot of credits so I'm pretty far behind. I thought I would enjoy being a school nurse but one night after watching my little sister wiggle her not so loose tooth so violently that it came out along with tons of blood, I changed my mind. Now I know what most of you are thinking: I have CF so it seems like I should be used to the blood and nasty things that go along with the medical field. I am, but seeing my blood or watching somebody give me an IV or even a PICC procedure is different. I'm totally comfortable with it. I'm not so sure I'd be as comfortable doing it to someone else. Plus as much as I go into the hospital the medical field should be the last thing I want to work in.

 Anyway back to my career battle. So then I thought about how I love to bake, I really do love it. I wanted to go to culinary school for baking and pastry. Every time I think of a career my dad usually tells me how that career might not be a good fit for me with my CF. For instance, being around sick kids, being around sick patients, and coughing constantly around food. I get his point, my lung functions definitely are not very good for my young age of 19 years old. I was around the 50s in May. I have not been able to go back to the doctor's yet because I lost health insurance once I turned 19. Still its discouraging to say the least. I have no idea what to do. What if all I want to do in life is get married and then be a stay at home mom? Is that really so bad? I cannot honestly think of any degree that I would love to have. Should I finish my early childhood degree. Should I go to culinary school? Should I just jump right in and try to start my bakery? I know I want degree whether I use it or not. Decisions, decisions.

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